Thus, we carry Him with us, He is always watching, for we are always watching, and though we forget sometimes that We and Everything carry Him, walk with him, each of us a Child, a Thought, the Logos, He does not forget, cannot forget, and whispers the truth to our hearts in the quote, that we are not Him, but He is us –
And He is out there among the stars, among the myriad worlds, worlds without end, hidden jewels locked within the vault of heaven, other dreams, dreams of joy and darkest nightmares, just like here, this own perfect jewel –
And truly we both love and suffer, and live a moment, and walk with God, and then end like all thoughts end, like all dreams go –
I dreamt of my dead grandfather last night, living – he was not living, but moved as if is was – and though I only independent him bald, he had hair, hair the color of mine – qnd my father his son was there too, who does live, black bearded, alp at the table –
And then this morning waking laughed and said about myself “he is risen,” my morning blasphemy.
And thinking of my own secret sins, and how I’ve forgotten them, or tried too, but cannot really, and think of how the He that is all has now seen that as well –
I have not been outside since Friday night. Since then, entombed here, eating the bread of affliction, my limbs weak, but any moment I will go and walk to the River and breath in the fresh air and be alive. And He will know that too.